Updated: Oct 23, 2019
Needs are needs and they are to be acknowledged and respected. We all have a need to be loved, to be needed, to feel connected and a part of something, etc and these are all natural needs. Nothing wrong with them, except when we allow our needs to take over and rule our way of thinking, feeling and behaving in ways that compromise our well-being.
This is why I wrote for the title of this post “beware of your needs” because no matter what need it is, that need, if it’s not in check, can take over you and turn you into a person that you are not otherwise. Balance in everything is important and it also important when it comes to your needs.
I think one of the best ways to balance out your needs is by putting as a priority your sense of peace and well-being. When you make your sense of peace and well-being a priority, no matter how much you may want something, you will judge whether it is worth having what you need based on how it makes you feel and whether or not it adds to your life. A perfect example I can think of is when your need is to be in a romantic relationship. That is a normal need to have but when your priority is your sense of peace and well-being, when someone that may seem like a good candidate comes along, you will be a better judge of whether or not this person is worth having in your life because you are not as hungry for that need since something else has a bigger priority. The problem with needs is not the need itself but the intensity of that need. Feeling hungry is normal but when you are starving, even a salty meal tastes yummy although it is not good for you. This is why I suggest that when having a need, offset it by making something else that truly is important like your peace and well-being a priority so you are not as hungry and settle for something unhealthy for you. Just like you would have a snack in between breakfast and lunch so that by the time it is lunchtime you are not starving, there are other ways that you can better handle that need you have and something else needs to be a priority for you to control the intensity of that need. “How can the whole snacking in between meals be compared to needing a romantic relationship?” you may ask and the answer to this is that I think the secret to not being so hungry for a need is to have other things going on that somewhat satisfies that need that you have. For example, cultivating other healthy relationships such as friendships and family can help when it comes to a longing you may have.
There is nothing worse for your sense of well-being than losing your center and balance in life. When you do lose these things, you become someone you are not, you make choices that are not right for you, you settle for situations that are not healthy for you so in essence, you are compromising your well-being. Nothing is worth you compromising your well-being, not even a need.
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